Things I've learned today

Or relearned.

1.  Mayonnaise and Miracle Whip are not the same.  I'm a mayo girl.
2.  The expiration date on Coke is there for a reason.
3.  If you have to turn off the hot water heater, the dishwasher will not work.
4.  I hate making out a grocery list.  Hate with the white-hot heat of a thousand suns.
5.  A missing phone guarantees that at least five people will need to get in touch with me RIGHT NOW.

And it's only 1:30.

AND ALSO:

6.  I shouldn't have looked up.  Too many cobwebs.
7.  "Toes" by the Zac Brown Band is inappropriate for a piano recital.  An eleven-year-old will NOT understand this.
8.  It is going to cost a hell of a lot to replace my phone.