Oh my goodness, I've been quiet!

Too silent here.  This time, it's because things were brewing that I couldn't talk about, and those things consumed all of my mind.  Whenever I sat down to write, I could only think about the "verboten" topic.  I even quit cooking with French Fridays with Dorie.  (Wow!  My family is missing that one.)

But here's the news:  I sold my shop.  My precious sweet little yarn shop.  I am so proud of it.  And I am so relieved that I'm no longer the owner.  Two and a half years ago I had an idea, really just a kernel of an idea.  I was in graduate school in a competitive program, and was realizing that it wasn't for me.  As a knitter of about eighteen months, I thought I'd like to spend my days surrounded by beautiful color and fun customers.  So, after getting my FIRST EVER 4.0, I quit to open my shop.  Talk about turning on a dime.  My husband is a wonderful, patient man.

Fast forward two years.  (Really, super fast fast fast forward.)  My children are two years older, and we have found that we looooooove to travel.  They are also so busy, with track and lacrosse teams, theatre musicals, horses, horses, horses, and homework.  They weren't like this two years ago!  And my sweet little shop?  Busy as a beehive, thankfully!  I had wonderful employees (including my mom!), but also hundreds of customers who truly felt invested in my little shop.  If you've never been in a yarn shop, you should venture in sometime.  It really can be a little community.  I've been blessed to celebrate so many births and anticipated children and grandchildren, as well as friends who received the fruits of my customers' labors.  I've also shared the lows, the illnesses and deaths, and have cried with my friends.  What a blessing to be allowed to share all that life has to offer. 

If you have ever received a handmade gift, I am here to tell you that the maker thought and considered, prayed and labored, over your gift.  I saw it.

But one thing that I didn't count on was that, as the shop grew more successful, it would require even more of my attention, not less.  I had the crazy idea that it would start to run itself.  WRONG.  And as my fifth "baby" demanded more attention, my home was faltering.  Not just the messes.  The going on field trips, the planning parties, the inviting friends home, just on the spur of the moment.  Every single thing was planned to the minute, with no room for a sick day or even a "sick and tired" day.  Couple that with the realization that my sweet oldest boy had turned twelve, two-thirds of the way to college, and something had to give.  Of course that was my shop.

I believed when I opened the shop that I was following a path that the Lord had laid out for me.  So when, after much prayer and deliberation, I decided I had to exit the shop, I expected that I would see some sort of path.  It happened so much faster than I expected!  The first day I told my employees, one of them called and offered to buy the shop.  Just like that.  I almost dropped the phone when she called me. Since then, we've had some little roadblocks, with timing and such, but overall we have had such a good time sharing this experience.  The attorney handling the sale just shook his head as he watched us agree to a price.  It was that easy.  She is thrilled, and so am I. 

So, the blog has been quiet.  But now it isn't.  I think I'll try to be more open, and I have some ideas moving forward.  I wonder what it will be like to be "just" a mom again, for the first time in two-and-a-half years.  I'm a little nervous.  But I also look forward to the adventures the kids and I will have this summer, and beyond.  And I think I'm looking forward to cleaning the laundry room.  I know everyone else is looking forward to that.  And a horse in my future?  Mmmm, maybe?

The value of horses

I am so lucky, because one of my children was born horse-crazy. Neither my husband nor I grew up around horses. We just had the little bit of contact with them that second-generation-removed-from-the-farm, suburban kids have: occasional rides on bareback with the docile old farm pony, summer camp rides for an hour or so. Certainly nothing about taking care of a horse. The bridle and bit seemed to be incredibly mysterious and complicated. No more.

DD3 was born with riding boots on, I think. From about the age of three she was obsessed, seeking all things equine out in books and at farms, wanting to ride, ride, ride. For a couple of years all the farms I could find just said, "No, too young, she needs to be seven, maybe eight." Until one day, a friend of mine, a rider, suggested I call her barn. And so DD3's love affair began in earnest at age six.

It so happens that as she was starting to ride, we had her learning disabilities diagnosed: an extreme deficit in short-term memory, particularly visual memory. (Can you say "sight word?") My poor sweet girl's confidence had been shaken mightily at school and she was unwilling to guess with anything. Our wise tutor knew she needed more than drills for memory and encouraged us to pursue the riding to build DD3's confidence.

Oh, how it worked! She embraced controlling this large animal using reins, legs and voice, and she welcomed the challenge of figuring out the tack. It makes me smile thinking of my sweet little thing holding a hoof in her hand and scraping out the ick, or pushing the horse's hindquarters around because he wasn't standing properly. And tack? It was no mystery at all.

My sweet girl became supremely competent at caring for a horse as well as riding it, jumping in the ring and taking the horse on trail rides. She learned how to be strong but gentle, with a firm hand to guide a feisty pony. And of course she continues to learn--she turns nine next week and shows no signs of tiring of her big friends!

Her little sister also rides. DD4 is a lovely, flightly girl who loves absolutely everyone and finds a way to put herself into the middle of anything that's going on. And she's blond, God love her. But for her, riding requires her to be more serious than at any other time. If she doesn't pay close attention she'll miss her jumps or not ride the correct way. For DD4 this level of concentration and quiet attention are a gift.

After seeing his two younger sisters ride, my oldest son decided to give it a go. This is such an unusual activity for a boy, even though many men are champion riders. DS1 is now a middle-schooler, and he has a tendency to be harsh. He is constantly reminded to temper his anger as he deals with an animal that may or may not be cooperating! There is NOTHING I can do for him (or to him!) that would give him this experience. But through this wordless communication he is learning how to be firm and determined but still kind and gentle. Great lessons for a young man.

There's also just so much stuff that goes along with horses: brushes, combs, sprays, picks, blankets, leather of all sorts. It all has to be cared for, especially because it doesn't come cheap! It is so wonderful to have them learn to take care of everything at the barn, part of learning the good with the bad.

We just went to a horse show this morning with our new pony Bailey. He did okay, but the kids did great managing this green little horse. So I've had horses on the brain. Just wanted to share a tiny bit of our experience. Yes, they are frightfully expensive but there is a lot to it, and I am so glad we've been able to give out kids this chance to learn from them. I can't encourage it enough.