1. Mayonnaise and Miracle Whip are not the same. I'm a mayo girl.
2. The expiration date on Coke is there for a reason.
3. If you have to turn off the hot water heater, the dishwasher will not work.
4. I hate making out a grocery list. Hate with the white-hot heat of a thousand suns.
5. A missing phone guarantees that at least five people will need to get in touch with me RIGHT NOW.
And it's only 1:30.
6. I shouldn't have looked up. Too many cobwebs.
7. "Toes" by the Zac Brown Band is inappropriate for a piano recital. An eleven-year-old will NOT understand this.
8. It is going to cost a hell of a lot to replace my phone.